As my weight and my body has been changing I keep asking my husband if he thinks I look good. He says you always look good. You look as good now as you did when you started losing weight. I never know if I should be upset about this or not. When I first started losing weight I was doing it because I always wanted my husband to be attracted to me. The longer my weight loss has gone on the more I realize he honestly doesn’t care. He loves me for me(let all the awwws be said)So who do I lose weight for now? Can I lose weight just for myself? Isn’t that selfish?
No one knows my number. No one knows my size. I’m the only one that knows these things. No one actually cares that I was fat and now I’m less fat. My friends love me regardless, my dad loves me, my kids love me, my husband loves me. So if everyone loves Fat Shawna then why even try? Oh because I want to be more then Fat Shawna. I want to be the girl that gets on the scale at the doctors office with my shoes on. I want to wear cute dresses without being asked how far along I am. I want to be able to wear leggings because they are cute not because they are the only pants that fit me at the moment. These are now my reasons for weight loss. Of course all the healthy stuff blah blah blah. That’s a given. But I think people are scared to admit why they REALLY want to lose weight. I want to be hot. I want to be Stacy’s mom. I want people to look at me and say I want her butt. Vanity? Very much so. I had to find good reasons to keep losing weight! If I’m not doing it for the people that love me there has to be other reasons.
So the question is who do you lose your weight for? Or what do you lose your weight for? Do you feel like your friends/family will love you more if you lose weight? Or have you realized that you are amazing as you are and you need to do it for yourself? Can you give up the cookies and cupcakes long enough to begin loving yourself as much as everyone else loves you?